Oh How He Loves Us

"Oh God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;

my soul thirsts for you;

my flesh faints for you,

as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,

beholding your power and glory.

Because your steadfast love is better than life,

my lips will praise you.

So I will bless you as long as I live;

in your name I will lift up my hands." (Psalm 63:1-4, ESV)

Have you ever been running on a really hot dry day and not carried your water with you? Your throat and mouth become so dry and your strength begins to drain as dehydration sets in; all you can think about is getting to water before you pass out. 

I rediscovered this underlined passage in my Bible last night, and it really hit me in the face.  It's just so beautiful to me, and a powerful wake up call. 

Think about it, this passage is basically telling us as Christians we need to seek God as if we are thirsting to death.  He is our water; He is our strength.  We need to constantly be striving for God.  We must continuously work to become closer and closer to Him.

In this passage, David writes that God's love is greater than life.  How completely and breathtakingly beautiful is that?  God's love is greater than the mountains; than the sunset on the beach; it's greater than this whole earth. It's greater than life.  I don't know about you, but that just makes me smile.  

God's love is greater than life, and we have His love.  He loves us!

God's love is kinda like that glass of ice cold water you finally get to on the hot day after running.  It pierces your dry throat and revives the strength you didn't have before.  When you are weak and straining to remain standing, God's love saves.

What really hit me in the face about this passage was that I really haven't been working hard to become closer to God.  I kinda put God on the back burner last semester, and it showed.  I was miserable.  (Now, not to say you can't go through hard times as a Christian and while seeking God. But Philippians 4:11-13, Paul tells that in whatever situation we face, no matter despondency or prosper, we can get through it with God.  We can find contentment in God; He is our strength.)

So yeah, I'm not perfect. Totes obvi. I constantly forget to put God first in every situation.  But I'm working on it.  I'm just so grateful for his unconditional love.

I hope that this passage makes you as happy as it made me.  :) 

I Will Survive

Post number 6!!!

This topic isssss.......

How To......

...Survive Your First Week of College

Okay, I'm just going to be honest.  This first week, I don't think there was a point at all where I had a firm grasp on knowing what the heck I was doing.  Yeah, there were times that I was that freshman with the campus map. (But it's a map on my iPhone, so it was a bit more discreet than a huge piece of paper.)

Needless to say, I am absolutely no expert at this college stuff yet.

But I am going to tell you just a few things that I found handy to have or do (or not to have or do) that made this week a little more optimistic.

- Eat. There is a lot of walking and you're going to need energy for that.  If you stay up late watching New Girl and decide to sleep in and skip breakfast before your morning class, you will regret it. Not that I know from experience or anything.... 

- Have snacks for in between classes.

- Take the dang stairs.  Not the elevator.  Why?  You need to work off all the food. No one wants the Freshman 15.  Gross.

- Listen to music or remember to do something that is calming.  It's a stressful week and you'll need something to keep the nerves down.

- If you decide to put a white board outside your dorm door for people to leave messages to you, remember that there is a high chance that not all those messages are going to be sweet and nice.  Especially if you live on a coed floor.  Just saying..

- Talk to people. It's nice to hear from other freshman that you aren't the only one freaking out about something or not having a clue as to what's up.  And talk to upperclassmen too, if you can, because they've already been through what you're going through and can offer some pretty good advice.. (usually).

- Leave for class about 30 minutes (or a different time depending on where your dorm is) before class is supposed to start.  Sometimes the class buildings can be super confusing to navigate and you don't wanna be late for class.

- Sit on the front row in your class. Yes, you will probably look like an overachiever, but I've found that it is so much easier to pay attention and stay awake if you sit in the front.  You can also hear the professor better and I think it shows the them that you actually care about the class. 

- Be sure to see things and be able to give them your own opinion, especially in you live on campus.  What I mean by this: there are going to be certain groups (*cough* frats) that many different people have VERY different opinions about.  And some people will say one thing, while another will say the opposite.  Get opinions from several people, not just one person, and pay attention to what's going on around you and how certain people are acting.  You don't wanna end up at a party that you find out is not somewhere you really wanna be.  I do NOT know this from any personal experience, but from listening to people and hearing VERY different things about different groups, I could see how it would be easy for this to happen.

- Do your homework, and have your books on the first day of class because YOU WILL HAVE HOMEWORK ASSIGNED. Sad, I know.

I'm done. This week has been insane, but I've loved it :)

Go see how Victoria survived her 1st week of college!

I Don't Care! I Love It!

Okay so this is really late. But here is the 3rd entry of the blog challenge with my best friend, Victoria! Go look at her blog.

Today's topic:

Summer Bingeing

What was my guilty summer pleasure?

*cough* 

It was food........ *cough* Okay it was food.  My guilty summer pleasure was food.

When I went to Ireland I ate. And ate. And ate. And ate some more. It was glorious.

I discovered that I love food. It makes me happy. Yeah, call me a fatty if you want.  But it's true. Food is good.  And I eat healthy.... usually. And exercise...... on occasion.

But anyway, over the summer I ate food.

The consequence of this bingeing?  I got a food baby. :( Oh well. It's not like I had rock hard abs to begin with.  But I don't really care. I love it. *Jams out to Icona Pop*

But hey, my college has a gym! Woop woop!

Oh! Which reminds me! I moved into my dorm today!! *Happy dance*

Isn't it cute?! ;P

I'M SO STINKIN' EXCITED ABOUT COLLEGE!!!

Classes start Monday! :O

Happy Friday!!

Get Out, Get Out, Get Out of My Head

Ok so I recently had a revelation.  

Not  a serious one.  I'm actually making this post because I'm trying to take my mind off of everything I'm stressed out about and I just want to write about something mindless.  

So I'm going to talk about ONE DIRECTION!

Insert *"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"s and "EEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKK"s* here.

Ok so this post isn't about fangirldom.  Nor is it about 1D hate.
Ok so this post isn't reeeeeeally about One Direction in particular.  I'm just using them as a very good looking example.

This post is about dealing with celebrity fandom syndrome.  You could even call it CFS. No actually you can't.  Because there is a legit chronic illness that uses the acronym CFS.  It's called Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. And I have it.  And it's not fun at all.

So anyway. This post is about realizing you have fangirl syndrome, and learning how celebrities are just people and learning to chill out about them.

I'm going to give this post another title:

~~~FACING YOUR INNER FANGIRL~~~

*Please note before you read any further that I am merely a 17 year old young lady with a MacBook, love of writing, an overactive imagination, and plenty of crazy personal experiences.  Take any advice within this blog with a grain of salt. This is more for mindless entertainment.  I'm not a shrink. *

Once Upon a Time, back in my senior year of high school this past February, I wrote a research paper on whether celebrities should receive special attention or not.  The thing was 12 stinkin' pages. When I wrote this paper, after hours. and hours. and hours. of research and tears and blood and sweat, I came to the conclusion that no, celebrities should not receive special attention.  I came to this conclusion for 4 reasons:

1. Celebrities are just people like everyone else.  Their jobs just so happen to involve acting or singing or professional sports playing.

2. Fans' extreme obsession can have negative effects on the celebrity.  Like fan mobs.  People get hurt and the celebrity can become emotionally scarred from all the attention and lack of being able to live a normal life.

3. Fans can be scarred because they begin to look upon the celebrity as their role model.  This is actually good in some circumstances: Ed Sheeran kicked his butt and worked hard to get where he is-- he seems to have a good work ethic.  Something that many people lack.  However, when I was 12 sooooooo many girls completely IDOLIZED Hannah Montana/Young and Innocent Miley Cyrus: young "country" super star supposedly grounded in family stuff and working to pursue her dreams as a singer/actress.  Ok.  But now who do you have?  Miley Cyrus: trying to be up-and-coming superstar who seriously flaunts her body in some pretty scary ways.

4. Your ultimate concern becomes your religion.  You worship what you hold sacred.  If you hold stars sacred, guess who're you're worshiping? CELEBRITIES.  And if celebrities are your ultimate concern, your religion kinda becomes Hollywoodism. That's frightening.

I know what you're thinking: "Mary, I really couldn't care less about your boring research paper."  Yeah.  It was boring.  But now I'm getting to the fun part!

What I didn't realize when I wrote the paper is that giving celebrities attention isn't necessarily bad.  When we give attention to celebrities, they are able to make a living, and we are able to see that they are normal people like us with some pretty awesome careers and have some crazy stupid moments and some rough days.  What we don't need to do is worship them. 

We don't need to let our inner fangirl consume us.  And this is how to fight her:

Look at this picture:    

I don't own this picture! (I got it off Pinterest...)

If your inner fangirl isn't screaming aloud right now, give yourself a good slap in the face to wake her up.

Reality is, the members of One Direction are hotties who are talented vocally and have adorable accents.  I mean, who doesn't like a guy with an accent?!

Two days ago my friend informed me that while she was sitting in her practically front row seat with her cousin at the 1D concert, Harry Styles waved at her.  And then she fangirled.  And then Harry laughed at her.  She practically had a moment with Harry Styles, awkward though it may have been.  Needless to say, I was pretty much green with envy for the rest of the day.  And very mad at myself for not coughing up the money last summer for a ticket to that concert. Oh well.

I would be lying to you if I said that I wasn't a fan of One Direction. I would be lying if I said that I didn't know every one of their songs and that I didn't have posters of certain members of the group taped to the back of my bedroom door-- in a total noncreepy way.  (But I've never classified myself as a "Directioner." I don't like to label myself.)

I've thought about how cool it would be to meet them and hang out with them and ok maybe date one of them.  DON'T YOU DARE LIE AND SAY YOU HAVEN'T.

But yesterday, I do believe I conquered my inner fangirl.  I came to a realization.

It all began when I showed my grandmother a picture on Pinterest of the British guy who waved at my best friend.  Yeah, I was still jealous.  And do you know what her response was? She said (and I quote): "Oh God, he's ugly!!" 

My dear, sweet, spunky grandmother.  She has no filter for her words.  If Harry Styles was within hearing distance of her she probably still would have said it.  Not that she's mean.  I think she's one of the coolest, sweetest people ever, and I love her to an extreme.  She's just brutally honest.  A trait I actually admire.

 I however believe that Mr. Styles is not ugly.  But when she said that I took a deep look at a picture of his face.  You do the same. Try to contain yourself.

I don't own this picture either! I got it off Pinterest as well..

Um.  Do you know what I see? A person.  A person who is living his dream.  A very good looking person.  But a person.

And reality is, every person is beautiful and fantastic because God made them.  And He's perfect and doesn't make mistakes.  

What I think happens is that we as stupid crazy humans come up with our own individual idea of beauty and "hotness" and judge people by it, instead of looking at the individual gorgeousness and talents in those around us.

Seriously. How many gorgeous guys are in your school or at your job?  I know there are plenty.  Do they have British or Irish accents?  I guess that depends on where you live.  Can they sing well?  Probably not.  But I'm sure they have some sort of cool talent.  If they don't then they're a loser and you shouldn't waste your time on them. :P

Anyway, lots of babbling later, my advice for over coming fangirldom to you is:  WAKE UP AND LIVE, PEOPLE!!!!!!!! GO OUTSIDE, GET SOME SUNSHINE, TALK TO SOME CUTE NICE GUY YOU ACTUALLY HAVE A CHANCE OF TALKING TO (just be careful.  don't come across as desperate or sluty.  That's not gonna get you a good guy.  Trust me.) GO OUTSIDE AND SPIN AROUND WHILE SINGING "BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY"!!! THIS IS THE REAL LIFE. LIVE IT. WAKE UP AND SEE THE BEAUTY AND EXTRAORDINARY THINGS IN THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU. yep.

In conclusion, yeah I think it's okay to know One Direction's songs (or have a favorite actor and watch their movies), and it's ok to think that a member of the band is gorgeous (or that actor is gorgeous).  It's ok to think Jennifer Lawrence is cool.  Which is good because I think everyone does.  

But keep in mind that even though that member of 1D is super hot, you most likely will never meet them, and you absolutely are likely to never. ever date them. or marry them. They may seem like Mr. Right, but you don't know them.  You may think you do, you creepy little stalkers, but you don't.  And what's important is that THEY DON'T KNOW YOU. But there is some hottie guy in your life that does. And some fascinating people in your life that do. Go talk to them. Mmmhhhmmm.

Celebrities are PEOPLE who's lives are in a snowglobe for everyone to witness. They're going to make mistakes. And so are you.  It's ok to look up to them, but don't wrap your life around them.  Because, yet again, they're people, and they're going to make mistakes. Try looking up to people you can actually talk to, like a family member, a teacher or something.

If I was a celebrity, I would want people to love my work, to be a fan of my work.  To like me because I was good at my job, and support me because of that.  Not because of my personal or physical appearance.  Think about it.

Ok this was a long post.  If you actually read the whole thing, I'm impressed.

--Mary

Oh Breathe, Just Breathe

I've always wanted to be a fighter, a "go-getter," someone who from the moment they wake up can't seem to stop.

But the truth is, deep down inside, I just want to hide under my covers all day in my warm comfy bed.

I'm not lazy.  That's not it.  When something needs to be done I do it.  I worked hard all through high school and my grades show it, I worked hard at my work, and I work hard at home.  Ok, maybe except in my room, but that is beside the point.

I think my problem is that whenever I sense a high stress situation, I try it avoid it.  This is probably because recently I have been diagnosed with anxiety.  And it's gotten pretty bad.  I don't like shopping anymore, I don't like being around people at all really.  I've discovered that I think that I subconsciously believe that if I avoid something that might be stressful then I won't have a panic attack.  I really hate panic attacks. (And anyone who says that anxiety is all in your head and you just need to "get over it" and "calm down" and "quit thinking about it" is an idiot.  How about you go have a panic attack and then we'll talk.)

But anyways, I've discovered that when you avoid things and push them away, life just gets more stressful and then the anxiety gets so much worse.  Like you begin not being able to sleep at night.  When I push things away, the stress doesn't go away.  It just keeps building up and pushing me down.  I know it may seem like a "duh" fact, but with anxiety, it's sometimes easy to forget.

So I've begun to start a new goal.  A goal to embrace the stress, breathe, go along with it, and fight it.  I know its not going to be an over night change.  It takes a while to break a habit and start a new one.  But I will work diligently at it.  I know I'll probably have to live with this anxiety for the rest of my life, and I would much rather take over it than it take over me.

I've also found it helps to talk about it.  Now, I'm a naturally very shy person, so usually the idea of talking to some one about something personal makes me extremely nervous, but I've been blessed with a best friend who just so happens to be going through the same stuff and is super encouraging.

Also, breathing helps.  Taking deep calming breaths can help relax the panic.  And remembering to breathe when going into a high stress situation I've discovered can help stop the panic attack before it starts (that was an idea I got from someone else). And it works.  Not all the time, but sometimes it does. And the less panic attacks the better.

Also, I've found eating helps.  This is no scientific discovery that has been tested, proven to work, and doctor recommended.  I have just found this out personally.  (I mean, what good granola bar wouldn't help any situation?!) Maybe food just relaxes me.  I think I may need to find a new method of therapy though before I end up the size of my house.

I also have to constantly remember that I am not alone.  Sometimes when I'm having a panic attack I basically panic because I'm panicking.  I think something is seriously wrong with me, and I feel like it's just me.  But it's not.  I have to remind myself that there are many people with anxiety, and where I am sure that every person's symptoms are different, it's nice to know I'm not alone.  We're not alone.

So go out and soak up some sunshine or dance in the rain.  Whatever your weather is up to right now :)

--Mary